Tuesday, December 29, 2020

Monday, December 28, 2020

Sunday, December 27, 2020

The Sunday Funnies

Dorothy was drawing trees in a forest, and each one was distinct and asymmetrical.  "Look at my out-of-shape trees," she said.

Dorothy kept asking to go to the playground, and I kept making other suggestions.  "Why do you keep dis-encouraging me from going to the playground?  Every time I say I want to go to the playground, you dis-encourage me."

We were on the third morning of Christmas vacation, and Dorothy came into my room where I was sleeping and woke me up:  "Mom, I want to go to open the Lego calendar, but I wanted to wake you up first, because once Daddy sees me, he won't let me come back here and wake you up."

If you mention that Dorothy's front tooth is getting looser, she'll break into a loud series of "Th...th...th..." to illustrate.

Dorothy watches Lego videos online and has learned the lingo.  Now she'll describe any character, including baby dolls, by their various joints:  "This Baby Born Surprise has five articulations:  her neck, and both arms and both legs."

Saturday, December 26, 2020

Friday, December 25, 2020

Thursday, December 24, 2020

Wednesday, December 23, 2020

Tuesday, December 22, 2020

Cookie decorating!

Thanks to U Daniel & A Valerie for the Advent gift!

Monday, December 21, 2020

Bass Pro Shop Through the Years*

 









*I can feel your judgment.  Bass Pro Shop offered appointments and a 5-minute adventure to take pictures with Santa behind plexiglass, and we went in early November!

Sunday, December 20, 2020

The Sunday Funnies

Dorothy was drawing pictures of members of our family.  She described, "I drew Daddy's glasses.  I gave Daddy his swirly hair also."

Dorothy wanted to play Uno.  "Ok, but remember that it's a no-crying game," I said, "because crying spoils the fun."  "Ok," Dorothy replied, "I'm gonna try to win so I don't cry."

We watched The Christmas Chronicles, and the little girl climbs into Santa's bag.  She fits her whole body into the bag, travels through a swirling tunnel of gifts, and enters an Amazon-type warehouse of wrapped presents.  The scene carried on for two or three minutes, and Dorothy finally observed, "The bag is much bigger than it seemed."

The next day we watched The Christmas Chronicles 2, where an airline employee gets into the spirit of Christmas and breaks into song with Santa Claus.  In the next shot, her uniform has turned into a sparkly red and silver costume as she belts a number.  "Where did she get that dress?" I asked.  "Maybe Target," Dorothy replied with sincerity.

"Why do your teeth get pointy if you suck your thumb?" Dorothy asked.  "They don't," I said.  "Where did you hear that?"  "You told me!" Dorothy replied.  I thought about it, and told her, "I think I said that your teeth get pokey if you suck your thumb, but I meant that they will poke out because they'll move."  Dorothy paused and looked slightly worried, and then said, "Oh well, my friends that I told that to probably forgot by now, right?  I mean, that was at St. James."

Saturday, December 19, 2020

Thursday, December 17, 2020

Monday, December 14, 2020

Sunday, December 13, 2020

The Sunday Funnies

Dorothy was hoping that a particular Lego design would be unveiled in her Lego calendar that day.  "You have a 1 in 16 chance," I told her.  "A 1 out of 16 chance," she corrected me.

I walked by Dorothy's room.  She looked up and said "Mama, I'm actually cleaning-up!"

Dorothy was learning to jump rope.  She's much better now.  But on the first day, after rhyming "Cinderella dressed in yellow..." many times, she complained, "I always mess up at Cinde-!"

Dorothy is obsessed with Legos right now.  She likes to build the set according to the directions one time, but mostly she is interested in designing her own creations.  For this reason, she gets excited about useful unique pieces.  When she opened the 10th day of her Lego Advent calendar, I saw an adorable moveable elf station for decorating tiny cookies; Dorothy exclaimed, "Yay!  A hinge!"

Dorothy was excited when I picked her up from school because she had received coupons for free food at Wendy's.  We read the coupons, which included a frosty and French fries, and Dorothy asked, "Is the French fry coupon just for French fries, or for ketchup, too?"

Chelsea on Barbie Dreamhouse Adventures must have made a big stack of pancakes, because Dorothy wanted to make chocolate chip pancakes after watching the movie.  I served her pancakes, and she requested that I stack them up, and then that I add syrup, and then that I make the syrup dribble over the sides.  The next day, she requested again to make chocolate chip pancakes, and this time requested all the same presentation, plus a big pat of butter that she had apparently forgotten the day before.

I asked if Dorothy would like a quesadilla for dinner, and she said, "Yes, but only if Daddy makes it."  "You liked the one I made yesterday," I said.  "You gave it two thumbs up."  "Yes," Dorothy explained, "but that was with ketchup on it.  Daddy's is two thumbs up just by itself."

Saturday, December 12, 2020

Friday, December 11, 2020

Thursday, December 10, 2020

Wednesday, December 9, 2020

Tuesday, December 8, 2020

Monday, December 7, 2020

Sunday, December 6, 2020

The Sunday Funnies

I told Dorothy, "I notice that you walked yourself into the school yesterday without a teacher.  Do you know your way to your classroom?"  Dorothy answered, "Not really.  The door keeps changing."  "The door keeps changing?" I repeated.  "Does your classroom change?"  "No," she said, "the door keeps changing into different holidays."

Dorothy asked what literate meant.  I told her, and she said, "Oh, I'm a literate."  "No, you're not -- you can read," I said.  "That's what I said," she responded.  "I'm a literate."

Saturday, December 5, 2020

Wednesday, December 2, 2020

The Willa Funnies

Willa turned 6 yesterday, and she has been a part of our lives for over 2 years now.  I've been writing down the hilarious things she says and in her honor I present The Willa Funnies:

Willa asked me if she could get the ticky tacky.  I said, yes, and she went to the kitchen to get the taffy.

Our Disney+ trial had expired, and later Willa asked, "Why your Disney + exploded?"

Willa slipped on the playground equipment.  I checked on her and she told me, "My shoes weren't sticky enough."

Willa was listening to the podcast that Dorothy loves, Wow in the World.  The hosts are Guy and Mindy.  "Who do you like better, Guy or Mindy?" Brian asked Willa.  "Mindy, I think," Willa said.  "But I haven't seen her body."

With two kindergarteners playing together, you can imagine that I talk a lot about "fairness."  Last week Dorothy read the words on the t.v. screen out loud, and Willa offered, "It's sort of fair that Dorothy is reading, because I am getting my ears pierced."

Willa is very excited about getting her ears pierced.  She asked if dogs get their ears pierced, then followed-up with, "That was probably in the 90s."

"My eyes are burning," Willa said.  "Oh," I said, maybe because of allergies?"  "Maybe because I've not been blinking," she said.

Willa was playing pretend, and she told me she has a boyfriend.  "Does your boyfriend drive a fast car?" I asked.  "Yes, it has 27 wheels!" she answered.

Our extra bedroom is the guest room; so Willa referred to our extra table in the dining room as "the guest table."

Dorothy hosted Willa for a slumber party, and when we were all having fun, I said, "This is the best sleepover I've ever gone to."  "Don't you mean "The best sleepover I've ever stayed to?" Willa asked.

At the sleepover, Willa was having trouble sleeping, and I sat on the end of their bed.  "Can you stay here until I fall asleep?" Willa asked.  "I'll tell you when I'm asleep," she added.

I turned on The Star, an animated story of the birth of Jesus.  "The best Christmas movie ever!" I announced.  "It's not really a Christmas movie," Willa told me.

Sunday, November 29, 2020

The Sunday Funnies

Dorothy has been able to recognize the Notre Dame logo from an early age.  Just this week she sussed out that it's made of interlocking letters N and D.

At Easter I unearthed a bright white waffle weave dish towel, which is still in circulation.  Dorothy spilled cranberry juice and cleaned it up with the towel.  "Ahhh, you're cleaning red juice with my best towel," I said.  Dorothy looked at it.  "I'm sorry, Mama," she said, "I didn't know that it had a bunny on it."

I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for Dorothy, and I put cranberry sauce on mine in lieu of jelly.  "A peanut butter and cranberry sandwich!" Dorothy announced.  "Isn't that a good name?  Let's tell Daddy that I came up with a name for your sandwich."

Dorothy followed me outside in the morning while I was taking out the garbage.  She was in her pjs.  "It's a cold day with cold wind," she said.  "Not my kind of day."  "Well, you're not wearing any pants, socks, shoes, or a sweatshirt.  You'd probably feel better if you were wearing some of those," I said.  "And even better if I was wearing all of those," she added.

Dorothy informed me that a piece of plastic had gone down the drain during her shower, and I was questioning her about it, and I said it would be okay except that only water is supposed to go down drains.  "And dirt," she sassed. "Isn't that the whole point of showers?"

A commercial advertised the t.v. show This is Us, which is apparently on its fifth season.  "Wait," Dorothy looked at me questioningly.  "There are only four seasons."

Dorothy has been unhappy with her podcasts lately because they've been discussing topics she doesn't like, such as germs and monsters.  Last night's Wow in the World episode was about predators.  "Predators!" Dorothy complained.  "Well, I guess they're talking about predators because it's almost Thanksgiving, and people eat turkeys on Thanksgiving."

Brian was playing a Christmas song on the piano.  Dorothy observed, "There's No Place Like Home for the Holidays is like the completely wrong song for coronavirus, right?  'Cause we want to go somewhere, but we have to stay home."



Saturday, November 28, 2020

Friday, November 27, 2020

Thursday, November 26, 2020

The Thankful List 2020

Again this year, Dorothy, Brian, & I each named something we are thankful for every evening in November.  Here, in chronological order, are Dorothy's items:

  • My parents reading to me.
  • All of my friends.
  • All of those doctors & nurses who are helping people get better.
  • For Ms. All that's working so hard for all the kids -- Cohort A, Cohort B, and Cohort C.
  • Baby Sallie, and helmets for wearing when it's time to bike ride.
  • Cars, my friends, Grandma & Grandpa, Gram & Big Daddy, helmets, masks, our Thankful Tree.
  • That the president that Mommy & Daddy hoped for winned.
  • Daddy playing the piano.
  • Willa & Willa's mom letting me do my first sleepover [when coronavirus is over].
  • My snail.
  • Momma not making me have my entire dinner before I have my ice cream.
  • Nothing right now.
  • Starfall [a computer game].
  • Mama thinking of doing socks on my non-footie jammies.
  • For reading in your pajamas day at school.
  • Camping.
  • For mama for covering the statue of the creepy deer with moss.  [While camping, I disguised a hunting deer dummy.]
  • Snail Willa.
  • Barbie's videos where she discusses things, kind of.
  • Maybe my new LOL, maybe not.
  • The little kid zipline at the Fall Festival [2019].
  • Ants -- I'm not actually like literally thankful, but I am sorry for them 'cause people keep stomping on them.
  • The Tooth Fairy.
  • Our make-up set.
  • I'm out of thankfuls so I'm just gonna have to start saying things I'm not exactly thankful for.
  • Mama letting me use her permanent markers.
  • I don't have anything else I'm thankful for...except for this hot chocolate.
  • Christmas.

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Sunday, November 22, 2020

The Sunday Funnies

During virtual school, Dorothy was disappointed when some other kids answered questions right.  "Dorothy, do you actually want the other kids to say the wrong answer?" I asked.  "Yes," she said, "because when they get it wrong, Ms. All calls on me."

We were listening to our favorite singer.  "Taylor Swift really likes to talk about liking someone and then getting mad at them," Dorothy rightly noted.

We were taking a walk and I saw that a neighbor had pulled her trash bin out next to the Trump sign in her yard.  "Look," I said, "Trump's out with the trash!"  Dorothy observed, "But the sign is still plugged into the yard."

"This nail polish remover is really crappy," I said.  "Let me put a new one on the grocery list."  I wrote "nail polish remover" on the list.  "Now write 'that's not crappy,'" Dorothy added.

Thursday, November 19, 2020

Wednesday, November 18, 2020

Tuesday, November 17, 2020

Monday, November 16, 2020

Sunday, November 15, 2020

The Sunday Funnies

Dorothy held-out a handful of Halloween candy.  "Can I have two pieces, or three?" she asked.  "One is not an option."

Dorothy and Willa covered their bodies in dirt.  As I was spraying them with the water hose, they were having fun discovering their clean skin.  "My legs look whiter than usual," Willa said.  "Maybe you're usually dirty," Dorothy posed.

Dorothy was examining the zipper on her sweater.  "These look like molars," she told me.  "Do you know that they're actually called teeth?" I asked.  "What?!?!" Dorothy exclaimed.

Dorothy's favorite podcast was going to offer a special episode on YouTube.  I asked Dorothy what time.  "7 p.m. Eastern, 4 p.m. Pacific," she told me.

Saturday, November 14, 2020

Wednesday, November 11, 2020

Monday, November 9, 2020

Dorothy's first pet

She named her snail "Willa."